hello!

You are all so kind a patient, thank you!
I've been having the most amazing walks with Kiki in the woods this past week, and can't wait to share the photos with all of you...hopefully tomorrow.
In the meantime, there is a beautiful male chaffinch which has been eating oats and hemp seeds from the feeder and then attacking the window, all afternoon! He is so amazingly hungry, has been eating for hours now. If he's back tomorrow I will try to take a photograph of him for you. Here's an image from google so you know what I'm talking about:

I can't help but wonder if there is a Mrs. Chaffinch, and possibly little babies, which he is bringing some of the oats and seeds to. I hope he is back tomorrow so I can capture this brave, curious little fellow in action.
Life does have it's ups and downs, it's winters and springs. I am really doing my best every day to count my blessings and not allow my mind to sink into those dark places which leave me feeling lost and lethargic. Depression runs in the family, and I am fighting it tooth and nail lately. The sunshine and blossoming trees help, as do, naturally, my husband and my Kiki. It isn't a lie when I say that I'm an optimist, that I look on the bright side of life and appreciate all the little, simple things. But it's also true that I am struggling to stay afloat in joy lately, and I want to be honest with you about that. 
After considering going down the pharmaceutical path for a few days to get me back to my usual 'happy' self, I decided that I don't want to take that step right now. I'm not saying I think it's bad, or wrong, and I am certainly glad that it is helping people. But I want to try and heal through other channels; through what I eat, what I think, how I spend my time, fresh air, and yes, therapy. I already live a very healthy lifestyle, which makes it all the more frustrating when I don't feel healthy and happy because it doesn't seem there is much room for improvement. But I am sure there is a way to heal from the inside out, without medication. 
I am glad to be back here with you, in this supportive community....thanks for all of the kindness and truth you give me.
I leave you with one of my favorite quotes:
"I should not talk so much about myself if there were anybody else whom I knew as well."

-Henry David Thoreau

I'll be back soon! Hopefully tomorrow! :)


xo country girl