Chocolate Cake and Healing

It was time to celebrate my mother in law's birthday, and time to see my sister in law's new son for the first time. I remember when I was pregnant last fall, I told Ramon's mother, "We'll be giving you a grandchild for your birthday!" "Well, that's just the best present I can think of!" She answered.


As you all know, I was not able to give her a grandchild. Instead she got a pink rain coat and shiny black rain boots from us. And a towering, 4 layer chocolate cake, decorated with Kiki La Ru Cake Bunting and flowers. My 3 year old nephew, who is still getting used to having a little brother, got his own mini cake, complete with rainbow sprinkles and a flag with his first initial. Something just for him, that he didn't have to share..."Only big brothers get these," I told him. 


I was nervous about meeting my newest nephew, who would have been about two weeks older than my own baby. And I was holding in feelings of sadness because I was going to this celebration without a newborn in my arms as I had pictured eight months ago. But it was time.


And once I saw that little being, sleeping stretched out, with a mohawk of fine hair and the smoothest, rosy skin, I only felt love. 


We dove into that huge, delicious cake while the baby slept behind me in his cradle. Once I heard him fussing a little, and I turned around to comfort him. He opened his eyes when I stroked his belly and smiled at me! A toothless, crooked little grin, before his heavy eyelids dropped and he fell asleep again. The sweetest thing. 


The only time I really felt my loss was when my sister in law nursed her newborn. Odd as it may sound, this is something I crave with my whole soul and body.


All in all though, it was a healing experience...over chocolate cake.

Black Devils Food Cake

a delicious vintage recipe from 'betty crockers picture cook book'

Preheat oven to 350° F (180° C)
Grease and flour 2 9inch layer pans or a 13x9 inch oblong pan.


Cream together 2/3 cups shortening (i used butter)  and 1 2/3 sugar (i used brown)


Add 3 eggs


Blend together 2/3 cup cocoa, 1 teaspoon vanilla and 1 1/3 cups cold water.


Sift together 1/3 teaspoon baking powder, 1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda, and 1 teaspoon salt.


Stir in alternately with with the cocoa mixture.


(I just threw the ingredients into my kitchenaid one after the other, beating well after each addition, and it turned out very fluffly and delicious)


Bake for about 30 minutes.
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My etsy shop is officially open now, with 10 lovely items. I am especially proud of the cake bunting. Stop by and have a look, if you like! click here: Kiki La Ru Shop .


xoxo country girl