Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Fresh organic watermelon juice, ice, and wild mint in a mason jar. The first hay fields cut under a big hazy sky. Tattered little vintage books. Roses wrapped in brown paper. That's late July.
The sun is shining today and dragonflies are everywhere, drying their wings I guess. Swallows are flying high again...they swoop down low when it's going to rain, and soar high up in the great wide blue when the weather is fare. Old fashioned weather forecasters. On grey days they fly so low that their wing tips skim the wheat fields.
My belly has hard spots all over. A knee? An arm? A foot? I rub, press, and guess. I've been pregnant so long now that I think this boy will never come, and will just stay in there, making me wonder which little body part he is pressing up against my hand. He likes it when I take bubble baths, which I do almost daily now to relieve my back and feet. He rolls and squirms when I squeeze the loofa over my belly. I think he likes the sound of the water.
I stumbled upon photos of Boston's first day with us today, taken about a year ago, and marveled at how brave little puppies are, leaving their familiar surroundings, their siblings, and their mother...taking the long journey to a new home, with unfamiliar smells and strangers.
I looked at the expression on his face and thought of how is little body trembled in my lap during the car ride home, and my heart broke all over again for him, knowing it must have been so scary. I glanced over at him, all confident and grown up now, sleeping soundly on a blanket with Kiki stretched out next to him, and was glad that he was with us...people (and a dog) who love him. A new family.
Now there is another new member of the family on the way. Helpless, dependent, putting all his trust into us to take care of him and hold him when he is afraid of how big this world is. He is counting on us to be his family, to be there for him, to not hold it against him that he is so fragile and needy, and to not be frustrated with him when he needs our help all hours of the day. To not be impatient with him while he learns the ways of this world, and gets to know the difference between day and night. To smile at him, kiss him, bath him, feed him, and comfort him.
Such an amazing journey ahead of us all....